Self Forgiveness Can Be Hard

This evening I’m trying hard not feel disappointed in myself. I made a mistake today. This mistake came from one of my many character defects -enthusiastic impulsivity. My action was not intentional in hurting or angering anyone, but it did. I was thoughtless. This person’s anger was justified.

Despite my work in AA ; learning how to recognize my mistakes and make amends when needed, I still feel disappointed in myself for failing to NOT have made today’s mistake. So, now I am in a place of sadness and self-pity. How could I have been so thoughtless? Why didn’t I think things through? Well, I suppose it’s because I’m still recovering. I’m still learning. 6 and a half years out of almost 46 years on this earth is not enough to keep me from making mistakes.

I have to remember that I took responsibility for my mistake. I put myself in the other persons shoes. Fortunately, I was forgiven.

What is the most difficult thing for me to do is forgive myself.

The day is not over. I still have a place to be with my son. I think it’s a good time to turn the lights off on my “Pity Party”.

Click. Done.

5 thoughts on “Self Forgiveness Can Be Hard

  1. When you feel like you have failed remember Peter. Jesus’ chosen one on which to build the church. He was very impulsive and he denied Christ three times. But Christ still loved him. Christ forgave him because Peter knew he messed up…again. We all mess up, stumble and fall as we go through this life. But never give up because Jesus never gives up on us. His hand is always reaching down to us and all we have to do is reach for it and if we are too weak to reach, He has been known to come down and carry us. Hang in there, it will be brighter tomorrow.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I can relate. We are too hard on ourselves sometimes. We are not perfect. We are human. Recognizing and learning from our mistakes is how we grow. Learning to forgive ourselves, is divine. It’s a process I am still working on. I believe God has forgiven me for even my worst mistakes. If I am to honor God’s wisdom, then I should forgive what God has forgiven.


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